Currently my life seems to be against me. No contopia...no birthday party, because it's senseless to ask all my friends, whether they've time..I know they do not have...or they do not want to pay the money to visit me at my home. I understand this. really. how could anyone want this to do?
well....I feel like somebody who's not important to anyone! I can't help it. the week started very well....I've got this great feeling about vacation. only one day and I can sit back and just relax. I really need a break. but today...everything has changed. my mood seems to be the worst at that time. there are thousand different thoughts in my mind...>__< drives me crazy. there's one person..I really like, but he's feeling very bad at the moment and he doesn't want to talk about it. this is so horrible. I want to help him, but I don't know how. I always feel bad, if others feel bad, doesn't matter, whether I know the person or not. x.x
There's only one person who really knows my feelings,too..and who also understands 'em. sad, isn't it?! x__x argh..I can't tell my thoughts in a logical way. sorry. you needn't to understand me....I myself can't understand!
I know I'm not very intelligent. I'm afraid of my future. my abitur. Can I pass? Will I become happy? Will I do something of what I'm going to think: yes..that was right?
I'm brainless and silly, childish and naive. Nobody could ever like or even love me, because I myself don't do this. This sounds so ridiculous and poor.....but that's exactly what I am. will I always be alone? Damn me!
Why do I have to be that stupid?
Why do I always cause pain and sorrow?
Why am I so selfish? .......maybe you should forget about me...even though I think people surely will do this anytime!

yo guys.....away from 9th til 10th december...BeVit takes place!! *__* I'm so looking forward to it.....all the people I'm going to see again! Joy joy joy!! >///<

so...babaiiii minna! ^___^

From now on my LIVEJOURNAL is




★★ Comment to be added ★★

Yeah..it's Pii!

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I'm still alive even though I don't feel good at that time.
But this shouldn't be the content of my entry. ^^

++++++++

>///< I found the way back to my old Sasuke-addiction...damn...this guy is THE coolness!! *___*
I so love him...+haha+ ^______^ Pure addiction!
I can't help watching Naruto *.* This anime is just lovely! And the japanese openings/endings...fascinating. I could fall in love with it again and again...^___^ ahh X___x I wanna see the movies!! >__<

Sooooo, some SASUKE-actiooon! ♥♥♥

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And here's one of my Sasuke FanArts I've drawn on the last two days.


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Yeah..it's time for dressing up like a zombie....XDD

IT'S HALLOWEEN! OMG..*__* I so loooove it!! T^T
And why the hell do we have school on wednesday? ;__; I wanna celebrate this day...♥

Is there anybody who wanna come with me to any festival??? I wanna dress up like a pirate or something else! ^__^
Well...here's a scene from one of my favourite movies ever. *.*



Even though I do not like the music of Manson I like this version! It's pretty cool in my opinion.
I know why I love this movie soo much!! >__< +falls in love again and again+ Tim Burton-Power!! +haha+ ^-^v

Right....+is going to watch Nightmare before Christmas later+ >///< +so much in love with it right now+ ^___^
Watch it in english....that beautiful! The british accent..>///<


EDIT: I wanna cosplay B(°A°)N from 少女-ロリヰタ-23区 anytime...! *3*
Is there anybody who wants to do it with me?

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥


It's your 25th birthday!
Wish you ALL the Best little! drummerboy!!! ☆
Health, success.....always a very good mood and POWER..because of your silly bandmates...XD
And do not care, if Reita's complaining about your food! You're the best muddi a band could have!! *__*
We luuuv ya all! <33 Keep smiling because it makes people veeery happy! (especiaally myself) And never stop beeing soo damn cute! ^__^

wahh..damn..[fangirlmode] X3

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Right, got tagged by Juni, so here are the 5 things

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It's checka-Pü!



*.* Damn....today I've seen THIS!

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D'espairsRay
LIVE DVD [LIQUIDIZE] －融合スル体温－
2006.12.20 Release!　決定!!!

Yeahhh..there'll be a new Live DVD in december! ^___^ I'm so looking forward to it!
I'm so happy to see them again! Hopefully two times! Maybe I can visit hteir concert in berlin,too...would makes me veeery happy! .__.

There are new pictures on their official homepage, but you can't save them..T^T Sooo cute ones...but watch it on your own! ^__^b

yeah....made a few pics of my cats. XD Lazy ones...slept in my bed almost the whole day.

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Well...nothing more to tell...I'm going to continue watching death note! Soooo great! *__*

Shumatsu is over....was very nice! I met a lot of dear friends again and I had fun spending time with them.
Even though one special person was missing...But I so hope to see you in Glauchau, right?! Maybe Kopenhagen will work nevertheless! `___´b

Well, some pics of our little photoshooting for HARAJUKU MAIDEN!

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Yes...beeing a Lolita was pretty cool! Looking like a white doll...I so love white chlothes! *.* I wanna wear further Lolita dresses! But do not pay attention on my shoes...u.u I didn't find the right ones! Maybe the next time: I thought about the Gothic Lolita meeting in december. I'm so looking forward to it!
Yeah..there are no photos of the other costumes worn at Shumatsu. Wore my Bou-Escapism on sunday again..so, I think the most of you already know it! And in the evening I was Kai...becoming a guy! X3 ohhh...and I had a fangirl! ^__- Qannie, what about our porno pic? XD SHOW MEE! I so wanna visit you at home soon! T^T

Yeah..nothing more to tell!

I only have one week! T^T And there's still so much to do..homework...a looot! u.u
And I wanted to start sewing my Maya-(LM.C)costume. *__* I so like these overalls of Aiji and Maya!
On friday I'm going to visit Lizzy in Jena! *___________* Yeah....we got it!! FINITE! I'm soo pleased about seeing her again!
And I so hope my dad is going to say: YES...you can do it! -__- I know him.
Argh..damn..I already miss my mum! .__.

yeah..getting sentimental....f^^ Right, that's all...way too long entry again!

Yo dudes!

Long time no see...must have been a very great time for you...X3

Well, KöVit was nice! I've seen a few friends of me again and these ones made my day.
I was so happy to see Miku and Ruki again. They're part of my Antikku-cosplay group! ^__^b You're soo great!!
Spending the time with you was a lot of fun and it made me feel good.

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And thanks to Jeeze,too! My dear father...XD It's cool beeing together with you! But why the hell do you live so far away from me?! HUH?! XDD

Right..even though it was great I was a little disappointed sometimes. Rena and Kana were left! And there were a few people I wanted to talk to a little bit more. Nevertheless I had a nice weekend. Right Mr. J? Thanks for staying with me til sunday. XDD

Yo....my new digicam arrived. *.* BUT....somehow it doesn't work. ;_;
I tried to take some photos, but quality isn't so good and all the pictures just look scary. It's kinda crazy.
Hm..I'll see. Maybe my father can help me with the adjustments.
So...took some photos with my webcam again. u.u I become tired of always taking photos with my webcam. X__x
Wanted to look like Kai....as always! XD But...I didn't. ;_; Life's against me!!

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Yo...see ya guys at Shumatsu! ^_^

Yeah..it's Pii.
There are a lot of senseless entries I wrote in the last time...sorry for this! f^.^
But maybe it's not that bad about an Lj?! It's mostly private and..senseless (XD) stuff..noone needs to read, so I'm happier if there are people who really read and comment! +.+

U~uhm..<3~ yeah, one another entry without any special sense. <3

Ya know..my digicam is still break down and there's no possibility to repair. T^T
So I just can take photos with my webcam. But quality is not so good, as everyone knows,too.

Today I took some photos of me wearing my beloved Bou-wig.
Aww..damn, I so wanna cosplay Bou again!! ;o;

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I would prefer cosplaying in a whole group....is there anybody who really wants to cosplay An Cafe with me?
I'm so looking forward to sew the kimono of shikisai moment...these costumes are just lovely and so beautiful!

Tomorrow I'm going to write my exam in maths...X__x I'm so afraid of it! But I think I can manage. I'm currently really motivated. `__´v Got 10 points in maths today...it's like a miracle..*.* +beeing proud+
Yeah....AAND on friday Juni is going to stay with me til monday!! +yaaay+ This will be a veeery crazy/ loud and looong weekend! I just say: BLUE NIGHTS...<33~

¡Ya estoy satisfecho sobre el sábado..sea una sorpresa grande!!! ^_____^
...pero TAPA SECRETO!!! ~ XD

Juni...Gaze están todo en el mundo. Go HERE...URUguay...TürKAI....XDD
I'll look for the others,too...<33~

Le besoin de continuer d'apprendre l'espagnol...u.u
大きい検査が明日ある。

See ya <3~

+pii goes weird+

Yo Dudes!

My day was kinda...strange! X__x In the morning I argued with my mum...and just about senseless things. I'm a so called ' Morgenmuffel'...u.u When leaving home I felt miserable because of this dispute. I don't want to hurt people with my words, but I can't control it when beeing in a bad mood.

Hm...I myself was a little bit strange the whole day,too! Sorry again Juni for not beeing that talkative and for confusing you with it! But I was so afraid because of our test in biology today. I just want to get good grades. I know that I'm ambitious...I can do it, but...sometimes I exagerate, I think. I really felt like a looser after our last lesson...I know that I only wrote stupid things in this test! Damn! There's the fear to fail! It's a little bit silly...maybe I want to show myself that I'm not that stupid I always keep thinking! ah..problems problems..as you can see! X3~ Just ignore it...XDD

Yeah...but Juni made my day: She developed the story of little Kai when he's eating Pudding! Mr. Muddis Pudding! Soo sweet! *.* Thanks again dear!

So, my cosplays for shumatsu are certain.

On saturday I'm going to wear the white dress, Kuma wants to sew for me! So, I'll be a Shiroi Lolita! I'm so looking forward to it...I ever wanted to wear a white dress with a white bow, white shoes and white socks! Looks sooo beautiful!


Yeah...I want to cosplay kais outfit from the Cassis-PV! I so love his coat!! Tsantali will be "my" Aoi..lDD +harhar+


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ButI still don't know what to wear on friday. o.O

I thought about the white suits of Gaze.

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But I'm not sure...I so want to cosplay Bou-kun again..;_; But I would like to cosplay in a group. It's way better I think.
I'll see....any tips? ^~^

++++++++
*__* I'm so happy about Despa coming back to Germany in november!! I'm going to visit their lives in Glauchau and berlin.>///< I so love them...can't describe it!! ;__;They're PURE LOVE!!

Hellow guys...this is Pii!

Just wanted to upload a few photos...and nooo~ I'm not bored! <3


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By the way: FILL THIS OUT! :3
(just boredom...as you can see)

1. My name:
2. Where did we meet?
3. How long have you known me?
4. How well do you know me?

5. Do I smoke?
6. Do I believe in God?
7. When you first saw me what was your impression?
8. My age:
9. Birthday:

10. Color hair:
11. Color eyes:
12. Do I have any siblings?
13. Have you ever had a crush on me?
14. Have you ever been jealous of me?

15. What's one of my favorite things to do?
16. Do you remember one of the first things I said to you?
17. What's my favorite type of music?
18. What is the best feature about me?
19. Am I shy or outgoing?

20. Would you say I am funny?
21. Am I a rebel or do I follow all the rules?
22. Any special talents?
23. Would you consider me a friend?
24. Would you call me preppy, a homie, average, sporty, hippie, glam, nerdy, snobby, or something else?

25. Have you ever seen me cry?
26. If there were one good nickname for me what would it be?
27. Are my parents still together?
28. What do I love?
29. What do I want to be when I grow up?

Maybe I won't go to Cologne.
We're 8 people altogether, who want to travel there. But there are only 5 seats in a car. so:
3 people have to stay at home.These 3 will be Rena, Kana and myself, I think. X___x
I really wanted to come! I'm sorry everyone...u.u But we only have one car.

I always seem to be the -happy-and-confident-person, who never feels bad or depressed, but currently I just
feel fucked up. Frankly speakin' I really hate myself at the moment. I don't really know what I want.
Sometimes it's better not to feel anything. The matter between my parents hurts me.
Especially the arguments between my dad and me. I don't know how to act anymore.

I didn't eat anything for three days. I'm happy about, because I have to loose weight.
Because of that I feel very tired and a little weak,too. I could sleep all the time. =.=
Hm, doesn't matter...
That's all! I won't continue going on your nervs :3

Hey dudes!~


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Cosplay changes:

I'm going to cosplay Aya from Kazoku together with Jeezü!
She'll do Yusa, the vocalist of Kazoku...our Yakuza!<3

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Oh, these guys are so lovely. +.+ I so adore their styling!
And their music is something special! Yusas voice sounds so beautiful!
He's very talented! *_* They're all so sweet and funny! XD
The so called Blödi-brothers...XD You need to see them in an interview!
I myself had to laugh a lot...that's cool! <3 Sympathetic boys!

I don't know whether I'll finish the biab-outfit in time, because there are only two weeks left...
Two costumes in two weeks..X__x And there's so much to do at school,too!
I apologize again, if it won't work..! ;_;

There's a sport event at our school tomorrow! We're going to play volleyball..
So...I don't have to get up that early! <3 Very positive, I think!
I'm always very tired these days...maybe I should sleep a little in the afternoon!
Would be better not to sit in front of the PC that often!!
Then, Good night to everyone! +zzz+